"An eye for
an eye makes the whole world blind." M. Gandhi
1 - Day 142
Introduction - 09:54 A.M. July 15, 1997 EST
This is a true story. It is a happening experience in the attempt to control the devastating effects that Multiple Sclerosis has wreaked on my physical body. I'd been diagnosed with the disease in the winter of '77.
I remember vividly the shock and disappointment I experienced on that evening in Dr. Goodgold's office when he told me and my girlfriend Carol, who has since become my wife and the mother of my two children, that, "You have Multiple Sclerosis. MS. Do you know what that is?" I hadn't a clue. "There's no known cause and no known cure and there's nothing I can do for you. When there's a cure, you'll hear about it on the TV. Give me a call then." At the time I had felt him to be insensitive and crass but in retrospect, my symptoms had been minor as compared with what they are today. So he knew I could handle it. I had no choice. I would have to handle it.
Well, that was 20 years ago and there's still no cure. And I'm still handling it - still searching for a cure - my cure. At the present time there is no one cure for MS. If there was, everybody would be doing it. But rather than sitting back and seeing things get worse, I've been in search of a miracle - my miracle.
All of my experience in personal healing has brought me to this place in which I find myself today. From the teachings of Paramahansa Yogananda to the controlling of the mind with Jose Silva. From Chiropractors to steroids, from acupuncture to chemotherapy, the Torah, the Kabbalah, vitamins, herbs, diet and meditation - I am ready to be healed. As my physician, Dr. Jim says, "Leave no stone unturned on your journey back to health." Although I have difficulty with my walking and balance - along with a few other of those MS quirks of the corporeal - I am doing surprisingly well. Certainly since the start of this bee therapy my condition has stabilized and perhaps. . . even improved slightly. And it's only been 73 days.
Some people have had miraculous results with bee venom therapy - BVT. People like Pat Wagner and Donna Chandler who have been a real source of inspiration to me. If you are interested in learning more about bee venom therapy feel free to contact them or myself. Pat offers an inspirational How-to Manual for $27. Get it by writing to her directly at; Pat Wagner 5431 Lucy Drive Waldorf, MD 20601-3217.
I am still a novice at all of this, but what I have learned I am happy to share with you. So far, the results have been promising.
I had been posting my journal on the MGH Neurology Forum but for some unknown reason it has been inaccessible since the beginning of July. Because of the many inquiries I've received regarding the success of this treatment, I will, for the time being, post on my own. My adventure began on April 27th when I received a phone call from Dr. Jim's office. Can't say enough for all of his support.
Ferris - Bees by Mail
Tim's MS Personal Page
SCLEROSIS EN PLAQUES ET/ APITHERAPI
Pat Wagner's web site - "The Bee Lady"
The Apitherapy Reference Data Base
Large Print Books
Day 2652 - 2:10 .p.m. September 13, 2004
Summer is officially over although I look forward to taking full advantage and enjoying more beautiful and refreshing days outdoors throughout the next few months. And yes, I am still committed to Bee Venom Therapy having stung;
July 30, 2004 stung 14x on my sides and thighs.
August 12, 2004 stung 18x on my shoulders, back, hips and arms.
August 23, 2004 stung 12 x on my sides, hands, calves and feet.
August 30, 2004 stung 16x on my thighs, hips, buttocks and knees.
Sept.11, 2004 stung 21x on my sides, shoulders, arms, hands, and buttocks.
Sitting out on the back porch is so fabulous. Often just listening to the bees down at the end of the property - the hives buzzing in activity. Always that gentle subconscious reminder that relief, although it may be temporary, is only a sting away. Indeed, stinging three times a week is excellent. Twice a week is great and once a week is very good. But just a sting whenever necessary is darn good! As Pat Wagner had told me when I first started, stinging - Bee Venom Therapy becomes something that you do on an "as needed" basis.
Both of my children are now in college. Man, how time moves
Gavin, my 20-year-old, is in his junior year and my daughter Katrina, 18, is entering her freshman year at the Crane school of music.
Sure, I miss not having the kids around, underfoot. Things have
certainly gotten a lot quieter and a lot neater! But I look forward to new and
different experiences in this new chapter of my life. Because "change" is life
made manifest. And change is growth and if you aren't growing you aren't living.
So along with my beautiful and loving sweetheart of a wife Carol the best is yet
to be! Sure, having babies and raising children is great and you hope that "good
stuff" has taken root. Carol and I are both eager to see them develop into
My friends Dennis, an incredibly talented sculptor, and Lisa, were married last week at the Major's Inn right here in Gilbertsville. Carol and I attended and on the afternoon of the wedding had a good sting session before dressing up fancy in our "Sunday best". I got into the van while Carol loaded the scooter in back - being ever so careful not to mess up her clothes. I mean, it's not like we get all dressed up and go to weddings every day. It only took a few minutes to get to town and park. Carol unloaded the scooter, again being extra careful not to get dirty. She looked so pretty - a designer off-white blouse and skirt. Then it was my turn to push out of the car and onto the scooter.
We walked down the street and paused momentarily where the road
met the manicured grassy lawn on which dozens of beautifully dressed people
chatted about with drinks in hand. The ceremony was to begin shortly.
But just as we were about to join the crowd I felt little droplets of rain. Rain? No way! We were under tree so I said, "Honey, let's wait here -until this passes."
"Yeah, I didn't think it was going to rain."
"Let's just wait here for a few minutes."
"No sense in getting wet," Carol agreed.
Remaining under the tree we admired the picture book setting. And even though the drizzle was quickly turning into rain we remained unconcerned. We were feeling quite sheltered by the overhanging leafy branches. But we were being fooled by this false sense of security even as we watched more and more people hurry off into the Inn for shelter.
And as we remained motionless on the edge of the lawn I began to have this sinking feeling we were in trouble. The rain was heavier the wetness soaking into my clothes clinging to my body. Things were changing quickly and we found ourselves in the midst of a full-fledged rain storm. The tree was providing less and less shelter actually - hardly any at all at this point - and indeed we were getting soaked. Carol's hair and clothes were now drenched as were mine. I knew that cutting through the lawn to the Inn could prove disastrous should my wheels fail to traction on the soggy wet grass. And as we debated what we should be doing it just kept on coming down! It poured and poured and poured!
Finally, it became obvious that we were now too wet to join the party even if I were to stop raining. That's right. All that we could do was to retreat back into the van scooter and all. But our spirits were high. 10 minutes later as we arrived back home the sun was shining once again. We then made the decision to start all over again and in about 20 minutes we had regrouped, redressed and making our way into town.
And that's what bee venom therapy is all about. Having stung that
morning I had energy needed and some to spare.
Day 2729 - 1:01 p.m. November 30, 2004
It's been a few months since my last journal entry. However I have continued to use Bee Venom Therapy at least once every couple of weeks or so.
September 29, 2004 - stung 18x on my sides, thighs, hips and
October 14, 2004 - stung 12x on my sides, arms, and hands.
November 1, 2004 - stung 16x on my hips, calves, shoulders and buttocks.
November 18, 2004 - stung 14x on my sides, thighs, calves and feet.
Whenever I feel that I need a real boost to my entire body and
overall system we go for it.
As I've said, staying with live bees is a most difficult regime - but it works and nothing else works quite like it.
I've been very fortunate and I've managed to secure a flu shot. I've been getting flu shots for years and am grateful that I will not be forced to do without one this year.
Have also started on a new drug called LDN. I had heard about it years ago but recently read a reports on a study that seems quite positive. It seems as though those who had been taking it for years have found their condition has stabilized while at the same time also improves the fatigue factor. And no negative side effects have been reported. The recommended dosage is very low and it is a noninvasive type of therapy. You can read more about it online at: LDN and Multiple Sclerosis (MS).
But that's the thing about bee venom therapy. It doesn't preclude
experimenting with other options. There is no cure so along with Bee Venom
Therapy I continue to explore and leave no stone unturned. With MS, every "body"
is different and everybody's condition takes on another mask. No two are a-like.
I remember when I was first diagnosed by Dr. Goodgold in 1977. He said, "close
your eyes and point to any city or town on a map. No two are the
Day 2790- 3:19p.m March 1, 2005
Stung yesterday 12x . on my hands, thighs, feet, hips and
It had been close to two months since my last stinging session and - without a doubt - I have definitely been missing it. My entire body had been missing it. This has been the longest amount of time that I had gone without stinging since I had begun this therapy eight years ago. And it feels great , and it felt great yesterday. When I sting, my whole body comes alive and wakes up.
There weren't any particular reasons why I hadn't stung other than it is a difficult regiment. both on the one being stung and for those who help me sting. Although I have 15 beehives out back. I had ordered these bees from Ferris. With a foot and a half of snow on the ground outside ordering bees is definitely the way to go.
My good friend Leon who works with me helping the stretch and exercise several times through the week, was here with Katrina yesterday assisting in the session. Hopefully Leon will be able to help me sting in the future.
I've been feeling pretty good and have been taking the LDN in hopefully this too will aid in keeping this "dis-ease" under control minimizing its progression.
Day 2985- 5:22 p.m.. August 29, 2005
Although it has been several months since my last journal entry,
the honeybee - Bee Venom Therapy, is always ever present and on my mind.
The beehives that John, the beekeeper from Franklin Mountain had been keeping in the backyard for the past six years are no longer here. For some reason the majority of the15 hives (too many) have not survived the last two winters and he has decided to move all of the hives elsewhere.
Life moves along.
My children, Katrina,19 and Gavin 21, are no longer living at home with us, out in the world doing their own thing. I'm very proud of them. But the reality of it all is that without the beehives out back and without the kids around to get the bees and help with the stinging process well, the dynamics of it all are no longer the same. And what is it that makes a difference? In a word: Support.
I believe very strongly that having others involved with you when it comes to this therapy's success is crucial. Because stinging is just not a normal thing to do without the support of others one will do whatever they can to avoid getting stung. For me, my greatest support is of course my beautiful and incredible wife, Carol.
But, without having beehives in the backyard , Bee Venom Therapy
now requires much more of a concerted effort. I've been receiving bees in the
mail from Ferris which is a godsend, but requires more of a determined
effort, desire and necessity to face this therapy head-on and say: yes I'm going
to sting at least once or twice a week and plan ahead. Otherwise it becomes way
to easy to delay and postpone getting stung at every turn along the way. Because
the mind will do what it can to avoid this "painful" yet "miraculous"
It's been a very hot and humid summer. My body tight, my hands stiff, feeling "off-balance" - you know the feeling if you're dealing with this "dis- ease". And yes over the years the MS has taken its toll even while using bees but hopefully it has slowed the progression because the bottom line is I know that when I'm stinging regularly I feel so much better and stronger than when I'm not. Bottom line is, the more I sting the better I feel. Over the past six months there have been too many weeks between one sting session and another. At one point over six to eight weeks had passed between sessions. And that is not what I should be doing and thus I am determined to recommit myself to Bee Venom Therapy.
Day 3195- 3:01 p.m.. March 31, 2006
Stung 14x this morning on my shoulders, hands, arms, buttocks and thighs.
Although I have not been making many entries into my Bee Venom Journal I continue to use and sting with bees. It is not on any regular basis that I employ this therapy but whenever I do get stung -- with the help of my loving and beautiful wife Carol --, it always makes a positive difference in how I feel. My body loosens up and my range of motion increases. But as I say it is a very difficult regime. But I feel very strongly that it is very beneficial to keep stinging and getting some amount of bee venom into my system. I try to sting once a week or once every two weeks but there are times that I may not sting for three or four weeks. And that's OK because Bee Venom Therapy is one of a variety of treatments I use in doing what I can to control the exacerbation of this "dis-ease". Try and slow down the progression. It does progress but slowing it down and maximizing quality of life is what I am after. To this end I stretch and exercise as much as possible, take vitamins and herbs, meditate and pray.
And I'm not the only one who is taking matters in their own hands
doing what they can with what there is. Support and sharing is also a key in
this life's project..Here's an e-mail from Tim, a gentleman who is taking
matters into his own hands -- looking for alternative treatments and a very
sensible and positive way. Tim writes;
I will paste in some information about my site. If you think it would be of interest to people who visit your site, please post it. I prefer to let (you) decide if the information is appropriate. Best regards,
Tim has a web site http://www.ihavems.com which you might find interesting. I know that I did. It's worth checking out. He discusses a new drug he volunteered to be a "guinea pig" for, foods that he finds beneficial for control of Multiple Sclerosis as well as some study results he knows of on the effectiveness of Bee Venom Therapy
Day 3288- 12:::22p.m.. July 4, 2006
Stung 10x on my arms, elbows, wrists and hands. It felt good and
it was more than worth whatever seconds of discomfort .
Last year at this time I had fallen and broken my nose. I knew at the time (Higher Consciousness knocking on my door) that I would have been wise to have gotten to a neurologist. That's because it is a well-known fact that stress stimulates exacerbation in those dealing with MS. Often Valium is prescribed in an effort to ease the situation. As usual I was meditating but in retrospect perhaps not enough. As the months progressed my body slowly exacerbated -- my hands getting tight, stiff and weak.
Finally, after a visit to the neurologist I made the decision to embark on a "drug therapy program". Last Monday I began with an IV steroid treatment (as a hospital outpatient) with two more scheduled between now and the end of August. I felt a bit more energized after the session but not as good as I had hoped to feel. But perhaps there will be more of a cumulative effect to this treatment, so I remain patient, hopeful and pray and meditate on positive results. One may be unable to always "set" things right but you can always work at "seeing" things right.
Additionally, I plan an appointments with a neurologist who specializes in multiple sclerosis. It will give me an opportunity to get a more objective opinion on my condition from a subjective point of view.
In the interim I have not given up bee venom therapy or stretching or vitamins or eating properly or herbs or prayer or meditation or whatever there is that can be done.
Thanks to my loving wife and great children super supportive friends and great family -- parents and siblings I am truly a blessed man.
The idea is to keep on keeping on. Now is the time to feel grateful for what one does have, take advantage of all options, leaving no stone unturned.
September 20, 2006
Just a quick plug for a friend who makes the most amazing and
delicious "Honey Jelly." Go to her web site and check it out. Give yourself a
treat that you deserve or send it to friends and family for a gift. The website
is Honey Jelly
- The Finest Southern Gourmet Jellies
Day 3449 - January 3, 2007
Stung 12x on my hands, wrists, elbows and hack. Although I have not been stinging and its often it is still a treatment that I imply once every 10 days to two weeks.
My son, Gavin, without my asking just brought out the bees and said, "come on Pop. Want to sting? And of course I can never refuse. And as usual, the stinging loosened me up. But I need more. I have been feeling very very tight and stiff especially my shoulders and hands, so anything that gives me some relief and is a blessing.. And I do plan to sting again this week on my sides and legs -- and maybe even on my arms and hands again and of course the neck is always a good place to sting.
On to a new topic: I've also been corresponding with Fran who has recently undergone a treatment for MS in the Bahamas. It is a Peptide Treatment and she feels that it has made an incredible difference in her condition as well as in the conversion of others. Here is a recent e-mail: Fran writes:
As you can see, I have changed my name to Bahama Mama, because of the glorious success of going to the Bahamas for the Esparanza Peptide Treatment for my MS.
I had been deleting the Esparanza site for almost 3 years, because I saw the cost and thought it was another one of those scams preying on desperate people suffering from MS.
From day one, spraying the peptide sublingual, I could stand without touching anything for well over a minute. Later, my husband would time me every time balancing for at least 3 minutes and with eyes closed and touching my nose. Walked on the 4th day, 15 feet, running a few feet of that. I was so excited, that I felt LIKE A REAL PERSON, for the first time in almost 18 years. This was truly the most remarkable feeling being really REAL. Just being able to stand in the kitchen and cook is REAL.
Esperanza Peptide Read this site, it will tell you everything about the treatment that I just receivedd in the Bahamas on Nov. 25-Nov. 30, 2006. It was well worth the trip. I am so glad I researched and took the trip. Research and study all that is on the Esparanza site or call me and I will certainly help you with any questions you may have. Fran
Well, Fran tells it all, how she sees it and how it seems to be working miraculously
in her life. I will certainly be staying in touch and following along. But MS
is different for all. But if it works for Fran hit me work for any one of us.
The treatment and its expenses are high but if it works you cannot put a dollar
sign on its value. And as I say, "nothing ventured, nothing gained." If there
are others that have experimented in this treatment -- are any treatment that
has worked for them -- I am always anxious to hear about it. Although the MS
has progressed in my life I am convinced that Bee Venom Therapy has been an
integral part of not only offering some relief of its symptoms but also slowing
down it's progression.
All the best in the coming year.
Day 3687 October 8, 2007
Stung 12 x on my hands (between thumb and index fingers) on the sides of my pinky fingers, atop my hand, atop my wrist, elbow and arm muscles.
It had been several months since I had done any stinging. In March 2007 I had gone to the Bahamas for the Esperanza Peptide which had shown some real positive results. Unfortunately however in May I got pneumonia and landed up in the hospital for a few weeks. As a result it had taken months to get back to where the peptide had brought me.
But Bee Venom Therapy had always given me the boost I needed and wanted and last month I ordered bees from Ferris and went for it again. Yet even with all my experience with this therapy I didn't go about it properly. Concentrating on one part of my body after being away from stinging for so long a period of time resulted in swollen arms and hands. Not the results I'd wanted but as they say if at first you don't succeed, . . .. And that is what I plan to do. At some point soon I will again order bees from Ferris and sting more wisely -- starting with only a few stings perhaps on my back or neck.
In the meanwhile I continue on the homeopathic Esperanza Peptide therapy and am looking forward to more improvements. But I'm also curious to see what a little bit of BVT to the mix would result in. However as I always say Bee Venom Therapy is a very difficult therapy to do, maintain and sustain. In other words, I have not as of yet ordered more bees from Ferris -- but I will let you know.
Day 4013 October 13, 2008
There's no doubt that bee venom therapy has been instrumental and beneficial in keeping me in as good a condition that I find myself. It has aided in slowing the progression and managing many of the MS symptoms. But after so many years I had found myself needing more. A year and a half ago I started on the Esperanza peptide treatment and this too is proving to aid in the slowing of the dis-ease's progression as well as a super energizer.
But my real hope is for stem cell therapy, and that is becoming more and more on a real possibility. And as I have always said, "I will leave no stone unturned" in my quest. I am now under the care of an MS neurological researcher -- Doctor Saud Sadiq of the Multiple Sclerosis Research Center in Manhattan. To this end I had a bacolefen pump surgically implanted this past summer in my side leading to my spine. this will serve as a port for the stem cells. Hopefully FDA approval is imminent -- maybe within six months.
Ferris - Bees by Mail
Tim's MS Personal Page
SCLEROSIS EN PLAQUES ET/ APITHERAPI
Pat Wagner's web site - "The Bee Lady"
The Api therapy Reference Data Base
Honey Jelly - The Finest Southern Gourmet Jellies
Large Print Books